Tuesday, October 30, 2007

Liberals Are Anti-Semites

I know, I know, the title of this post really caught your attention. You must be thinking that you are about to read some baseless, heated rhetoric. Hear me out though and you will soon agree with my conclusion, which is utterly logical and empirical. This morning's Detroit Free Press had a little blurb about the upcoming Ann Arbor Folk Festival. In addition to the great and underrated Ben Folds, the lineup has some other noteworthy performers, like Toad the Wet Sprocket, Emmylou Harris and Jill Jack, all of whom Mrs. Zwicker and I would love to see perform.

Alas, being Jewish Sabbath observers, we cannot attend most of the festival because it will be on a Friday and Saturday night. In other words, we are suffering because we are Jews. Who is causing this suffering? Think about it. Ann Arbor, which, in case you couldn't guess on your own from the festival's title, is hosting the musical event. Ann Arbor is also a major hotbed of liberalism. It is therefore quite reasonable to conclude that liberals scheduled the festival. Liberals are therefore causing Jews suffering. Ergo, liberals are anti-Semites. Case closed.

Wednesday, October 24, 2007

Album Covers

Today being a slow day at work, I found myself surfing Al Gore's Internet*. I came across Rolling Stone's list of 25 favorite album covers. I think that I share many music fans' opinion that an album cover can be a work of art. I also know that there is no right or wrong when it comes to favorite works of art. At the same time, whoever comprised seemingly chose album covers based not on the artwork but on the music on the album itself. After all, is there really anything great about the covers of Bruce Springsteen's "Born to Run" or Blondie's "Paralell Lines"? They're just pictures of the musical artists. While some of the entries are true classics, like Nirvana's "Nevermind" and the Beatles' "Abbey Road", I would certainly have included, among others, these:

Derek and the Dominoes- "Layla And Other Assorted Love Songs"

The Who- "The Who Sell Out

Cream- "Disraeli Gears"

If anyone is still reading this blog, feel free to nominate other choices.

*NoahDaddy-It's a joke.

UPDATE: For a music list that is much more relevant and well selected, click here.

Monday, October 01, 2007

I'm An Idiot

Over the years, I have done some pretty stupid things. I volunteered to be gabbai. I wasted time and money to see more than one Police Academy movie. I've even voted for a Democrat on at least one occasion. Last week though, I took the cake.

The Zwickerettes and I drove down to Louisville to spend the first few days of Sukkot with the in-laws. Right before getting on the Southfield Freeway, we were sitting at the CVS drive-through when I commented to Mrs. Zwicker that I felt that I felt that I forgot to pack something in the car, which was my responsibility. Sure enough, six hours later, just fifteen minutes from the in-laws' house, I realized that I forgot to pack all our hanging stuff, including my suits, shirts and ties and Mrs. Zwicker's dresses. I also forgot to pack Mrs. Zwicker's hats.

When I brought my oversight to her attention, Lesley's first reaction was to laugh her butt off. At first, I didn't understand why she wasn't angry. I quickly realized the fallacy of my rookie-like thinking. My boneheadedness meant Mrs. Zwicker's guilt-free shopping for new clothes. We made a detour to the mail, where, hundreds of dollars later, we had new duds for the holiday.